We May Have A Rock

Tuesday we had a Board Meeting. I wrote three reports for it and analyzed all the financial data for the year, except for the Utility Bills, which I didn't quite finish. Mycroft went through every "Zombie To-Do List" that has been sent to us (or not) over the past two years and compiled a Master List of Items That Have Never Been Attended To. This was probably 500 repetitive pages, but he got it down to three.

Then we had Yet another meeting of the Condo Board Thursday. It was for Yet another round of Manager interviews. The first three were our top contenders on the list, and oh, were we disappointed! This time, we were all a little depressed, going for the "second choices."

On the first Round:
1. "Strict Machine" Diva who would have been great, except we can't afford her and she doesn't want to come here.
2. Young, bright, enthusiastic young man who would be eaten alive in two weeks. Nothing wrong with him. Everything wrong with us. He deserves to live.
3. Experienced, dynamic man who is not over the shock of losing his last job and talks more than the rest of the Board combined (how is this possible?)

Last night:

1. Cannonball who was all enthusiasm but never answered a damn question, although he talked a lot. He brought extra items for us to read, even, but none of them were anything we asked for. This would have been okay if he had actually brought what we DID ask for.
He needs some time with the Strict Machine above. (Zam, boom!) Not our guy. He was also young and would have been eaten alive, but less trainable than the other guy.

2. The Rock of Gibraltar. Very calm, answered our questions almost before we asked them. Stayed on point, said exactly what he meant, and stayed on schedule. Worked his way up in this field from a maintenance man, and then into a head position at a 14-story mixed-use condominium high-rise.

I kept imagining the surf of B.S. we have around here knocking him on the chest, only to be beaten back again while he still stood. This is a man with tight control. No hysteria from Zombie Assistant or any Board Member is going to keep him from using a method and imposing order.

3. Mr. Suavity:  Well, he was our favorite going in. And upon impact, he's suave, charming--and arrogant. He was so sure he knew it all. Actually, I'm pretty sure he did. But he's a careless talker. "I'm not going to do it by myself," he said, which is true--it was just the way he said it. (Halfway through the interview, I was just writing quotes that made me mad.) He talked about "disguising his weaknesses" "stealing knowledge" and about preparing the Board for a meeting, he said, "I can read you my report. Or you can read it in advance." This is also true. And then, when asked about how he handles different personalities, he said: "I may not like you. You may not like me. You move, you change; new Board Members come in; they're happy." What???!!! He wants to get rid of us already?

On a scale of 1 to 5, I gave him a big fat Zero. Two people gave him "5", and the remaining two gave him "2" Everyone wanted to know why I would do the Zero. I blurted out, "He's a drunk."
And I think he was drunk--a charming, belligerent, cynical, witty drunk. However, you can give me a diplomatic FAIL on that one.  The entire room got Really Silent.

As for The Rock, he received all "5"s and one "6" on a scale of 1 to 5. We are now plotting how to get him in. Everybody, cross your fingers! I am fairly ready to end my sixty-hour work-week without pay. It looks like it might be less than two months away.